I have. The biggest. Hickey. EVER. On my neck right now. Hiding it has been a bitch. I put concealer on it and it still shows. I'm afraid the bruise is gonna turn green or something. Oh my god. I am never letting that boy near my neck again.

So I have been spending a lot of time with Work-boy for the past few days. Oh, this is farkin' ridiculous. His name is Josh. I have been spending a lot of time with Josh for the past few days. "Watching" movies and such things. And talking. Oh my, talking! This is a whole new concept for me. A boy who actually wants to talk to me. Who actually has intelligent things to say. It makes me realize how much of an asshole my ex actually is. I mean, I knew he was bad, but until now I genuinely thought that I just wasn't deserving of an actual cool guy. But I am.

I got "the talk" from my mom. She seems really cool about it. I am hopefully stopping at the clinic tomorrow and getting a prescription for the Pill. She thinks it's a good idea. She's not all "No no, wait til marriage" and all of that, she sympathizes and she knows I will make a responsible decision about it. And also, SHE certainly didn't wait until marriage, judging by the fact that she married my dad in october 1985 and my sister was born in december 1985. Hee.

Anyway, I don't really know how soon I'm going to go through with this, and I'm certainly not feeling any pressure about it, but for chrissakes I just want to get it OVER WITH, you know? Mostly out of curiosity, but also because I really like this guy, and I just feel different than when I was my the ex. With him, I wasn't sure if I wanted to have sex with him, but he kept pushing for it. With Josh, it's the other way around. I'm sure, and yet, he isn't really trying to force me into anything. Which I like.

Oh yeah, did I mention he is 23 and knows kung-fu? Yeah, he's the best. I am so happy at this moment. The only thing that sucks about all this is that my sister doesn't really approve of all this, which I hate because I depend on my sister alot, you know?

Anyway, I guess it's back to googling "How to hide a hickey" for me.