Welcome to the guestbook "John", and thanks for joining us from some computer at Marianopolis! Though I appreciate the visit, I must warn you that my life is of no interest to you. I don't know who you are and if you know who I am, then that's already too much for me. If you're going to stalk me, have the courtesy to contact me or at least leave an email adress, or else don't manifest yourself at all. It can't hurt anyone if I don't know you're there!

If you want to come clean, or update me on how all my little Marianopolis buddies are doing, or if you want to warn me you're coming to my house in the night to cut me up with a bloody chainsaw, please feel free to email me or something. Til then, reread your Stalker's handbook.

IN OTHER NEWS

Dear United States of America,

Canada is really sorry that it didn't agree to your whole missile shield in the sky thing, but let's face it, not only has no one attacked Canada in about 150 years, no one has even shot anything at the States since the early 1940s. Also, although the recently publicized Canadian budget gave more money to the military, there are still only 7 soldiers in it. We do not have any armed forces, so are we worried that those "damn Russian commies", as you say, will attack us through the Artic? Hell, kudos to them if they try.

So yeah, we're really sorry we're not letting you use our sky as a buffer between you and the enemies you have brought on yourself. We promise we will pay it back to you. You can borrow our lipstick next week or something. Or you can have some of our diseased beef and oil reserves.

Totally sorry, man. We hate to do this to you, after you sent us all your tourists when our dollar was shit low. Oh, and your churches are even helping our churches fight gay marriage? How generous!

Yeah, we are assholes. But we are assholes with MILES AND MILES OF WHEAT FIELDS. Natch.