I haven't done anything wrong, really. But I haven't been writing. I haven't done anything, and it's been killing me slowly. Being passive is what I'm good at, but it's slowly tearing my soul to pieces.

I went to camp, and camp was wonderful. I always forget how great it is, and I cry every time ... I hope I can go back next year. Yes, I'm almost 17, and yes, I go to school with some of my camp counselors, but damn it I don't want to be too old to go back!!

I met a guy. A wonderful, caring, nice guy who also happens to be amazingly good-looking. But I don't want him in that way. He is such a great person and I don't want us to stop talking after camp but really, I don't have a crush on him.

But it made me realize. This guy is a lot like my boyfriend. They look alike, in some ways they behave alike ... Except the boy from camp is so much more caring. Less lewd, less sexual.

There are things I don't like about my boyfriend. But I have put up with them because I wanted to be with someone... And now I realize there are people out there who have all the qualities I love about him without any of the bad stuff.

Maybe we went too fast. Or maybe while we were both gone this summer, we lost it. The spark. The magic. Whatever you want to call it.

And on top of that, we never see each other. Starting college is making my life super hectic, and it seems like I never have time. I leave at 7 AM and I get home at 7 PM and that just doesn't leave time.

But I don't know if I have the guts. How do you bring that up, exactly? How do I tell him I don't love him anymore without sounding cold and uncaring?

And more importantly, how do I resist his charm? I know he'll try to change my mind and I know I'll fall for it, because I want to hope that everything will always work out.

I don't know what to do. I feel horrible.