A month and a half. I'm not going to see him for a month and a half.

As a last sort of goodbye, the boy and I went to see White Chicks. Well, we wanted to see Dodgeball, but apparently the ticket girl interpreted "Dodgeball" as "that stupid Wayans brothers movie", which we only noticed when the movie started. Oh well.

After the movie, since I had never seen his house (and I had heard so much about it), we decided to walk over to his place. In the dark. Through the pouring rain.

It's fun to make out in the rain.

Anyways, just as a note for future reference his house is friggin' HUGE. I mean, I was told he was pretty rich and that his house was pretty big, but no way was I expecting this. Seriously, people. HUGE.

We didn't go inside, but he walked me to the bus stop, pointing out all the huge houses in his uber-rich neighbourhood as we went along. "Oh, that guy owns the Quebec branch of Post-It(TM). Those people won the lottery ... Those people over there have a savings account for a Porsche waiting for their 8 year-old once he starts driving."

Geez.

We got to the bus stop and realized we had some time to kill so we just sort of stood around and kissed and he had his arms around me the whole time and it was just so ... *sigh*.

He gave me a bus ticket. I didn't want to take it cause I've taken way too many from him over these few weeks, but he stuck it in my pocket. I didn't use it. I told him I'd give it back to him next time I saw him.

He told me he would miss me and he would have a lousy time in Greece because he would always be thinking of me and how I couldn't be there with him. I told him I would miss him even more because he would be out doing fun stuff in a foreign country and I would be at home doing nothing. He sang to me a bit.

I didn't realize before now how much I love him. Before, I thought he was just a guy, someone to kiss and pass the time with while waiting for school to end and something new to start. I never thought I would actually fall for him, and I never thought I would actually think into the future and see us still together. It was a highschool fling, right?

Now I realize that I love him. I want him there everyday, I want him to hold me and whisper inane things in my ear and walk me home and kiss me. I want to be here, not a million miles away, not across the ocean, but right HERE. I don't ever want to spend a day without him, and now I'm faced with a whole six weeks without him and it just makes me want to break down and cry.

While writing this entry I've had "You'll be in my heart" by Phil Collins looping on my Kazaa and I just feel like bawling and calling him and telling him to come over and never, ever leave.

I'm starting to scare myself, I don't want to get obsessive ... but it's hard not to cry.